Study-Abroad Roommates Call Her “Little Girl,” Track Her Groceries, Mock Her Spanish, And Make A 24-Year-Old Feel Like A Child In Her Own Flat

Last week, a 24-year-old woman, excited about her study-abroad experience in Spain, found herself in a situation she never expected. Moving from her home country to immerse herself in a new culture and language was a dream come true. However, her new adventure quickly turned sour due to her roommates’ condescending behavior. It seemed like what could have been a fun and enlightening experience was becoming a rather isolating one, filled with patronizing remarks and mockery.

Once she arrived in her new flat, the woman was thrilled to meet her roommates. They were all pursuing advanced degrees in STEM fields, and while they were slightly older, the age gap didn’t seem significant. However, she soon discovered that those few years made a world of difference in how they interacted with her. Every day brought new interactions that left her feeling belittled. Whether it was the tone they used when answering her simple questions or the way they dismissed her attempts to engage with them, she felt as if she had stepped back into her teenage years.

One of the first things that struck her was the way they greeted her when she came out of her room. Instead of a friendly “hello,” the remark “she’s alive!” echoed through the flat. It was meant to be light-hearted, but to her ears, it felt like a jab. The roommates seemed to forget that she was an adult, not a child. And this infantilizing behavior only escalated. They would frequently refer to her as “little girl” or “the kid,” often accompanied by a playful pat on the head—a gesture that felt more patronizing than affectionate.

When it came to language, this was perhaps where the woman faced the most frustration. As a language student, she had worked hard to develop her Spanish skills. Yet, whenever she spoke Spanish with her roommates, they pretended not to understand her. Locals had no problem comprehending her, so the behavior felt downright insulting. “It’s like they want to undermine my confidence,” she thought, questioning whether she genuinely sounded that disconnected or if they just enjoyed seeing her struggle.

The mockery didn’t end there; they also poked fun at her social habits. Having a single beer while watching the World Cup became fodder for jokes about her supposed “alcoholism.” She rolled her eyes, baffled that they couldn’t understand the cultural context of sipping a drink while celebrating a major sporting event in Spain. It was all part of a series of unsolicited judgments she faced from them, from her diet to her lifestyle choices. They were early risers who ran long distances each morning, and it seemed they couldn’t fathom that someone might enjoy a leisurely breakfast instead.

At times, her roommates would even critique her eating habits. One of them went so far as to go through her groceries and trash, doling out unsolicited advice on healthy substitutes for her food choices. “I know what you eat every day!” they would say, as if her eating a tortilla or indulging in some jamón was a crime. The sheer audacity of their comments left her feeling ashamed, as if she needed their approval despite having a perfectly normal relationship with food—she wasn’t even overweight!

What troubled her the most, however, was the way they laughed among themselves when she spoke. It wasn’t always a direct mockery, but the smirking and the whispers made it abundantly clear that they were making fun of her. That behavior fostered an atmosphere of isolation, leading her to retreat further into her room. She felt the walls closing in, trapped in a space that should have felt welcoming. The longer she stayed holed up, the lonelier she became, second-guessing everything she said and searching for reasons behind their treatment.

Now, just a week into her stay, she found herself stuck in a flat with people who constantly made her feel small and inadequate. Unable to afford to move, as her study-abroad loan was still pending, she felt like she was living in a purgatory of sorts—neither here nor there. The thought that she had done something to deserve this treatment nagged at her, and she questioned whether she was overreacting or if anyone else in her situation would find the same dynamic upsetting.

It was a situation that many could empathize with, and the lack of understanding from her roommates only compounded her feelings of loneliness and helplessness. Being so far from home and facing this hostility made her study-abroad experience feel less like an adventure and more like a challenge she hadn’t signed up for.