In the world of office politics, there are few things more annoying than that one coworker who thinks they can get away with slacking off while everyone else is working hard. This particular story revolves around a coworker who not only exhibited a level of arrogance that was hard to ignore but also had a penchant for spending his work hours playing solitaire instead of doing his job. Let’s call him “Dave”.
Dave was notorious in the office for his self-inflated ego and a constant need to remind everyone of how important he was. It was all talk, of course, and as many of his colleagues would soon discover, he had gotten away with far too much for far too long. The tipping point came when he outright stole an office from two employees. Yes, he literally waltzed in one day, plopped his things in a newly vacant office, and acted like it was his right to take the space. The fallout from that incident still lingered, but what was even more maddening was the fact that he spent most of his days playing solitaire.
It all came to light when some performance issues were reported regarding his machine. His computer was running slower than molasses in January, and IT was called in to investigate. My team decided to look into it, knowing we’d likely find something ridiculous. Lo and behold, after a little digging, we discovered that Dave’s computer was running solitaire consistently. Not just a few rounds during breaks; no, he was practically a solitaire enthusiast with how often it showed up in his activity log.
In a moment of petty brilliance, I hatched a plan. I opened the solitaire executable file in Notepad (thank you, Windows for letting me play around), and I started deleting random characters before resaving it. The result? The game would crash immediately on launch. It was a harmless little tweak but I couldn’t help but chuckle at the potential fallout. I had no idea just how entertaining it would be.
A few hours later, my phone buzzed with a helpdesk ticket. It was from none other than Dave himself. The subject line read: “Programs are crashing on my machine—NEED FIX ASAP.” The moment I saw it, I knew this was going to be good. I calmly opened the ticket and began to respond—what programs? It was time to poke the bear.
When I asked Dave to specify which programs were crashing, he responded with, “Lots of them.” My eyebrow involuntarily raised. “Lots of them?” I thought to myself. I pressed him further, asking if he could specify a couple of programs that were giving him issues. His response was vague at best, filled with lots of hand-waving but not a single concrete example in sight. I suggested he call me the next time something crashed, and to please make sure he noted what he was doing at the time, leaving the crash pop-up on the screen. That way I could come over and assist him directly.
Surprisingly, after my request, Dave went completely silent. Days turned into weeks, and not a single word from him about any crashing programs. It was like he had vanished into thin air or, more likely, he had finally realized that he could no longer play solitaire undetected. The look on his face when he realized he couldn’t ‘work’ his usual magic was enough to make my day.
As time went on, gossip began circulating through the office about the mysterious issues plaguing Dave’s computer. Another IT team member even questioned why Dave hadn’t followed up on his urgent claims. He had gone from being the center of the office attention to a ghost—one that no one wanted to talk to. Meanwhile, the rest of us continued our work, knowing that Dave’s ego had taken a hit, thanks in part to some petty, harmless revenge.
Looking back, it was a simple moment in time, but the impact it had on office dynamics was quite significant. Dave learned a hard lesson about taking advantage of his position while the rest of us found some joy in the situation. Who knew that a little tinkering with an executable could lead to such a satisfying turn of events?
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