If you have ever settled into the seat you picked months ago only to find a stranger already sitting in it, you know the awkward tug of war that follows. One frequent traveler, whose posts are tagged with flight attendant life, says a long flight home from Gabon is a big reason she does not enjoy being a passenger. Her message to everyone boarding a plane is short and simple: book your seat.
Creator @cloudsurferandy7 explained that she is a very particular traveler when it comes to seating, and she was not shy about why.
@cloudsurferandy7
A window seat booked four months ahead
She said that as soon as she gets a flight ticket, she goes straight to the airline and books a window seat. She described herself as pedantic about it. She wants to be at the window, either to shoot content or simply to sleep, and she said she does not care for the middle seat or the aisle seat. Some people love the aisle because they can get up easily, she said, but she would rather have the window.
For this trip home from Gabon, she had picked her window seat four months ahead of time. When boarding day arrived, she walked to her row, which she remembered as 50L, a window seat. There was already a man sitting in it.
The seat swap that went nowhere
She said she was polite and told him he was in her seat. He suggested she just sit in his seat instead. She said no, explaining that she had specifically booked that seat so she could sit at the window. He answered that he was already sitting there. She asked to see his boarding pass, and he replied that he simply thought she would not mind taking his seat, since he really wanted to look out the window.
She held her ground. She told him he had not booked that seat and that she had, and asked him to let her sit in it. According to her, he rolled his eyes and asked why she was making him stand up again. She said that was exactly what she was doing, because it was her seat. She noticed other passengers around her watching. Eventually he got up, but she said he kept complaining and saying he preferred the view.
She was clear that she understands it was a full flight. But that is exactly why people book their seats ahead of time, she said. If he wanted the window, she added, he should have booked it. Her line was simple: you are not going to make your problems my problem.
The long night flight
Once she settled in, she discovered a woman in the middle seat between them. Her seatmate tried to befriend the woman, who was not interested and simply wanted to sleep, and in her words, drink some alcohol. It was a night flight, so after the meal service she started watching a movie and drifted into a light doze. She was not fully asleep, so she could still hear what was going on around her.
She happened to be leaning back on the headrest, not against the window, when she heard the man comment that she was not even sleeping against the window and was just using the headrest. She said she does not owe anyone an explanation for how she uses the seat she booked.
About an hour later, she needed to use the restroom and asked him and the woman between them to stand so she could get out. The man told her that this is why she should have chosen the aisle, since then she could just get up. She said she had little patience for that on a five hour flight, and she made it plain that she was not in the mood to be tested. Her closing message was that it is hard to be a passenger when other people behave this way, and she asked everyone to please book their seats ahead of time.
What to do if someone is in your seat
It is a surprisingly common situation. People sit in the wrong seat because they are tired, confused or hoping for a better view. Most of the time it is an honest mix up. Here are some calm ways to handle it.
- Double check your own boarding pass first. Make sure you have the right row and letter, and the right date and flight number. Mix ups happen to everyone.
- Ask politely and show your pass. A friendly “I think this is my seat” with your boarding pass in hand settles most disagreements right away.
- Do not argue in the aisle. Boarding is already crowded. If the other person will not move, let a flight attendant know. Seat assignments are their job to sort out.
- Stay courteous. A calm tone keeps things from escalating, and it makes it easier for the crew to help you.
- Do not agree to swap unless you want to. You are free to say no. If you do choose to trade, make sure it is because you want to, not because you feel pressured.
Why choosing a seat early pays off
Her habit of booking right away is a good one. Airlines often let you pick seats at the time of purchase or shortly afterward, and the best ones tend to go quickly. Some fares charge a fee for selecting a seat in advance, while others include it or assign seats later. Policies differ from one airline to another, so it helps to read the fare rules before you buy.
The window seat is a favorite for many people. It gives you a wall to lean against, a view of the clouds and a bit more privacy. The aisle seat is popular for the opposite reason: easy access to the restroom and extra leg room in the aisle. The middle seat is the one most of us hope to skip. Knowing which one you prefer and booking it early is the surest way to get it.
Being a good seatmate
It is worth remembering that a shared flight takes a little courtesy from everyone. If you are in the middle seat, be gracious about moving when your neighbors need to get up. If you are at the window, ask kindly and say thank you. If you would like a different seat, ask the flight attendant or gate agent before boarding, rather than asking a fellow passenger to give up what they booked.
Her story is a good reminder that most of the friction on an airplane comes from small things. A friendly word, a bit of patience and a respect for the seat someone else chose and planned for can make a long flight far more pleasant for everyone on board.
